My First Entry into this New Year

I’m flustered, my morning ritual of walking seems to have awaken my senses but the heat here drains me too. Just like every morning, I look forward to that first cup of coffee. I get comfortable on my stool and strategically layout my cup, my nuts and my writing instruments. Just the aroma arouses my taste buds, My morning coffee is like having an orgasm without the show! I sip it and I’m instantly induced into another level of zen. I’m an avid coffee and tea consumer, but my afternoon indulgence holds no comparison to this morning brew. 

I munch on my almonds as I pay gratitude to this day.  My journal awaits its entry and I think for a minute.  The morning music in the background, the smell of incense and the view of the sea. What else could I possibly want this morning?

My mind wanders to the events that I left behind this past year. I alone have come a long way, but many people in my life have also grown with me. This isn’t just another day, it’s a new beginning to make things better, to tell people what they mean to me, to find the good in everything and to accept what is.  I’m grateful today for the chances and for the opportunities. This time may not come again.  I’m missing things that would make my life perfect, but then I also know, perfect doesn’t exist. I want, just like every human, but then I also know that we don’t get everything we desire. I need a holding hand but then I also know it comes with a price. Happiness is a journey and right now I’m walking on that road. I’m learning to not look back, not to pay attention to what broke me. I’m mending my soul and I refuse to evoke that past in me. I refuse to let noise and fear enter my space.  I’ve come so far in my life that I know I can weather a storm. I walk in confidence now and I’m comfortable in my skin. 

I reach for my cup and my coffee has become tepid, a bit like my life really, laid back and easy. I’m grateful today for this second chance at life and I promise myself to keep walking forward, to look up and keep going. As I take the last sip, the thought of pouring another cup crosses my mind but I shake it off. The second one won’t give me the same pleasure, I’d be drinking it just for the sake of it. It took me a long time to learn to savor the moment, so I’ll just let it be, here’s to my morning coffee, new beginnings and to another Year!