This is what it must feel like to be in your mother’s womb. Warm, safe, free. I long to be back there, unborn, naive and innocent. Protected and dependent on the one that will birth me. Enclosed safely in your own cocoon, no other being around you, undisturbed, your peaceful Place. We never stop growing yet you can never feel this safe again.
A slight breeze touches my bare skin and I open my eyes to meet the building towering above me. It’s rigid and stern, perfect for blocking the sun while I’m floating on my back in the middle of a pool. The water is motionless, just me, the water, time and my thoughts. Above me I see the blue only a beautiful morning can paint, the sky in its deepest shade of cobalt lacks nothing, silently it beckons for my eyes. I follow a few feather-like clouds floating by and my eyes close once again.
My thoughts catch up with me. When I leave this life, will I feel just like this? Will my soul emerge free and weightless just as I feel this moment. No burdens to carry, no person to please, no expectations and no emotions. I hear the early morning birds and hustle and bustle of day break, yet my thoughts seem eluded by my surroundings. Each day we awake, life unfolds and we are the ones maneuvering towards the chaos that complicates it. I’m content today. If I feel happy I’ll dance like the waves and if I feel pain I prefer to be still like this, and sink into waters where I can let go. But today I’m just content. Happy that my life is unfolding with ease. A slight breeze brushes my bare skin and I see the ripples it forms. Perhaps from now on my life will flow like this. Gently, effortlessly, like floating in my mother’s womb.